Survivor Stories
Mara
It’s with a broken spirit I write. On 08-24-03 I was leaving the chowhall. The c/o stopped me as I was leaving. I thought it was a routine pat search, the c/o felt me locks around the waist band of shirt with her left hand in the small of my back, her right hand she put between my legs and felt my private part like I had stolen food there. I said to her (c/o) “You don’t have to feel my private part the bathroom is right there to strip search me.” Plus I don’t steal. I walked back to my unit in tears. [Illegible] woman actually violated me, I am devastated. Mine you I was the first in line, she pat searched the others, [illegible] them. I’ve invested years in recovery because I am a victim, survivor of rape and molestation. Years of recovery has been destroyed.
For weeks I have cryed, there are no words to compensate for what I am feeling. What she has done to me is playing in my head over and over again. I spoke to the 1st shift Lt. and the 2nd shift Lt. about it. I also wrote my unit manager, the Mayor and the Warden. I was told I had to follow the chain of command. I did.
On 8.24-03 this c/o friend worked 3rd shift she snatched my door open (2:30 am) and give me an intimidating look. I ignored her. On 8-25-03 she worked 3rd shift again this time I wake from a sound sleep (3:00 am) this woman face is a foot from mine staring threateningly into my face. This was [illegible] I couldn’t sleep for the rest of the night.
Bear in mind I suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, high blood pressure plus I am a diabetic. I refuse to go into the show hall because I am petrified of the c/o from what she has don’t to me. Plus I really don’t sleep at night for fear of the other staff (c/o) So right now my health is at risk and so is my safety and security. I have no protection.
I got a reply from the 1st shift supervisor basically lying to placate me. Not one person has talked about what was done to me. Both c/o’s are still working on the East Side. To my knowledge there has been no investigation. If I could I would have this c/o arrested for “Sexual Assault” and have a Order of Restraint against both of them, to protect myself.
In 1998 I wrote up the one who sexually assaulted me for racial harassment. She got a verbal reprimand and it stopped. I don’t know the reason for what they’re doing to me. It’s not within their job criteria and it unprofessional and unlawful. If I’ve done something address the issue as I’ll know as it is there is no justification for what was done to me.
I am in the process of writing the Commissioner to inform her what was done to me and the c/o not reprimanded and no action was taken to protect me from them. Not even a investigation. My statement I wrote and the chain of command requests I wrote have been totally ignored. Because I am living unprotected and in fear my health is deteriorating and my safety is in jeopardy.
I will be consulting my lawyer concerning what legal options I have available to me concerning the unprofessional, unlawful behavior of both c/o’s. If need be let the court order or enforce the protection the DOC is not giving. Mara I am a 56 year old woman. I never thought I would be violated like this. I am so embarrassed. I can’t sleep for thinking about this. This woman is sadistic and do not deserve to work here.
Rest assured I will do all I can to make both are reprimanded for what have done. They have abused many other females here who can’t defend themselves for a multitude of reasons, I can and will. The atrocities that take place here have been going on for years and DOC workers have protected each other. I know this for a fact. If the Commissioner doesn’t address this issue and take action I will appeal to Internal Affairs to investigate. I am sure this will uncover more than what was done to me.
I had to share this with you because you are a woman of understanding and you have permission to share my letter with ones of interest and if they want to contact someone on my behalf all for better. Rules, regulations and laws were made for all of us for protection, equality and justice why am I being abused, threatened and sexually assault and unprotected by the state of CT.
I have a early release date of 2005-2007 my sentence is completed. My institution record speaks for me. Please rest assured I am very please people are trying to make a positive difference in the penal system. It is so desperately need. I thank you for all you are doing to help us. How is the CT. chapters of CURE doing? I hope you and your family is doing well. I get frustrated sometime because I am a “DOER”. I alleviate the stress I feel by doing something positive. Therefore I will be busy for awhile. Please write when you can.
Love
Bonnie